3/03/2015

My February on Instagram

February. What a miserable pisshole of a month. It's a good thing it's the year's shortest month, and it's a good thing alcohol is always an option.

But - oh shock and suprise - I just flicked through my own Instagram feed and it looks like this last month wasn' actually all bad. I've had some fun times, too. Let's take a peak.


Just like February is my least favourite month, Tuesday is my least favourite day. So a Tuesday in February is the perfect time to have a glass of crazy overpriced champagne with your friend.



I also bought the most glittery, sparkly golden shoes in the entire world. And I love them.



As past of my job, I went to a bowling alley with our local hockey team. Who are all much, much better at bowling than I am...



I ate the best burger you can find in this town. The sweet potato fries that come along with it are stupid, but the burger, oh the burger....



And I had the girls over for a fun evening of boozing, overeating and gossiping.



The sun came back and we decided to have our daily morning meeting at work on the rooftop terrace. (It was still crazy cold and everyone froze to pieces, but still...)



I bought myself an outfit that shows off my newly acquired abs. Here's to something I sure as hell never thought would happen...



My friends came to town for a Saturday afternoon and we all hung out and had fun.



I went to the shooting of a commercial with the hockey guys, which kinda makes up for all the times I had to get up at 5 in the fucking morning to go to work...



I also had the best curry of my life, when I went to that new curry place in town, together with my mum...


And I ended the month with a raging hangover, loads of shame and a wonderful breakfast with an old friend. (By the way: These are sunglasses I plan on wearing this summer. Awesomepants doesn't even cut it here!)

2/22/2015

The last days of Peter Bergmann



If you have 20 minutes to spare on this grey Sunday afternoon, you should watch this short but haunting documentary about Peter Bergmann - a man that never existed.




In 2009 a man who called himself Peter Bergmann traveled to a remote Irish town in order to disappear completely. Which he kind of managed. This documentary is the portrait of a ghost.






You can watch the entire documentary here.

2/16/2015

Elegie For A Dog.



Almost 12 years ago, my mother took my little sister and me to the dog pound and showed us eight wee, black, fluffy balls of fur. We picked one of the fluffballs, a tiny black thing with a white cross on her chest, a bare pink belly and light brown paws and took her home. We called her Molly.

Molly wasn't the smartest dog in the world. Nor was she the bravest. But she was sweet and kind, she never barked and she never growled. Even people who are scared of dogs loved her. Because all she did was shove her nose into your crotch for greetings and then lie down under the table. Or basically anywhere where there was food. She loved food. One year, when my mum was having a birthday party, she snuck into the coat room and ate an entire platter of spicy chicken wings. Once she raided our Easter chocolate baskets.



She also loved the snow and lakes and rivers to swim in. She loved rolling around in other animals' poo. She once hunted down a small deer, only to lick its shaking head and then leave to sniff at something else. When she wanted us all to get up in the mornings (usually at the reasonable hour of around 5.30...) she would stick her wet, cold nose into our faces and huff and puff until we got up. During cold winter nights, she would sneak under our blankets, place her head on the pillow and spoon us. She also managed to take up an entire king size bed for herself somehow.


And when we sat in front of the tv in the evenings, she would plop down next to the couch and stick up a paw for us to hold, until she fell asleep. If you let it go before she was fully asleep, she would puff indignantly and stick it up again, until you took it.


This Saturday I came home to the usual crazy welcome by that lovely dog. For 10 straight minutes she wagged her tail, made her weird squeaky noises and made me rub her belly.

It was the last time she did that. A few hours later, she was in so much pain from the tumors that have plagued her the past few months, that we had to take her to the vet to be put down. She was sweet and kind until the very end.



Sleep well, Molly Malone. I hope you're somewhere where you can eat fox shit, roll around in dirt and hunt rabbits forevermore!

2/12/2015

Middlefinger Thursday



Looong silence on the blog the past few weeks. I do apologize for that. January and February are usually the most sucky months of the year and this year I have the added bonus of a shitload of work to do at my job. So I haven't been in a very bloggy mood the last time.

But - here are some fun things from the internet to brighten up your Thursday (which used to be one of my favourite days of the week, but now I'm just like: Why isn't it Friday afternoon yet?!)


1. This young Ukranian ballet dancer dances his heart out to Hoziers "Take me to church". David LaChapelle directed the whole thing, which only goes to show: The man got skills! (other than taking weird, oversexualized pictures of famous pop icons...)




2. Here is a small girl who's best buddy is a tiny pig. Prepare to say "Aaaawwwww", everybody!


3. My imaginary boyfriend Andy Samberg sings about a very lovely day he is having. Story of my life. (Minus the drugs!)




4. If you are looking for a fun destination for a trip, go and check these out. I want to pack my fucking bags like RIGHT NOW!


5. Tiny hamsters go on a tiny date! No more words necessary!

1/23/2015

5 things to brighten up bleak January

http://www.dumpaday.com/random-pictures/funny-pictures/funny-pictures-day-120-pics/

God I hate January. It's too dark, too cold, too bleak and all I want to do is to crawl up under a blanket and not see or hear the horrible stuff that is going on in the world and around me. Since I can't, I try to give myself a few tiny breaks during the day and look at happier things. Here are five of them.

1. A fairly short horror opera about Shia LaBoeuf. There is actually no proper way to describe this (because it is INSANE!), but it is oddly brilliant!




2. This is Pixel. Pixel is a French bulldog and has found his evil counterpart in his owner's cat. This video contains every reason I love dogs and despise cats. I mean, this cat is clearly an asshole!




3. How Rock'n'Roll Legends would look if they were still alive today. John Lennon is most shocking I think...


4. The trailer to "Mortdecai". It's funny, silly, it has Olivia Munn and Johnny Depp in it - I will most definitely watch it!



5. Aaand last but not least: Some designer is trying to make penises happen. Of course this is happening... I mean, we already had this...

1/19/2015

Why 2015 sucks sweaty balls so far.



Last Friday a large portion of my favourite co-workers lost their jobs. The local tv station that was part of our company is now history, the people who have worked there for the past years (and in some cases: decades!) are now out of work.

There are no words to describe what happened on Friday, no words to describe the shock and the incomprehension. The weekend was filled with a haze of hours spent sitting together, drinking and chain-smoking and somehow trying to make sense of it all.

I have no idea how my working life will be,without these people within a few metres radius from my desk. My guess is: Not great. Yet I am deeply grateful that I got to know them, got to work with them and have them around for almost every day for the past year. Without them, the office already feels eerily empty.

These people were not so much co-workers as a weird kind of family to each other, fights and disagreeings about daily bullshit included. And even though I've only known them for a year and mostly got to watch from the sidelines, they have always welcomed me with open arms, invited me for beer and let me in on dirty inside jokes. You guys were a massive part of what made my job awesome!

I still don't quite believe that this is over.

1/15/2015

There's a reason people fuck with us.


I like myself a good documentary. And sometimes, when I'm in the mood, even a weird one. I recently stumbled across this oddity by Vice on the internet and was instantly hooked. Slightly off-putting, it tells the story of the (apparently famous?!) ATL Twins. I had never even heard of them, but evidently they are a big deal in the US.

They are porn stars, actors and semi-pro skaters and are mostly known for sleeping the same bed, never being apart, dressing alike and fucking the same girls at the same time (at one point they were engaged to the same woman.). They also casually hang with Bieber and James Franco.

If you have 30 minutes to spare, you should watch the documentary below. It's a bit like a car accident, you can't really look away...








(as always, click on the picture for source)

1/14/2015

Bästa kladdkakan med blåbär


Since I have a bunch of lovely people around me who like me enough to say nice stuff to me, I get compliments on a fairly regular basis. And the thing I most often get compliments for, is my baking. Which is a bit weird, because baking is really the easiest thing in the world.

But a lot of people I know claim that baking is really very complicated and takes so much time and they just suck at it. For these people (and of course for everyone else) I have now the fucking easiest recipe for the most fucking delicious Swedish chocolate cake (with blueberries) in the universe. And it only takes about 30 minutes to make. Seriously: a trained monkey could do this!!!

Kladdkaka med blåbär (Swedish Chocolate Cake with Blueberries)

You need:
110 g butter
100 g dark chocolate (If you don't have any: leave it out! who cares?!)
2 eggs
2,5 dl (or 240g) sugar
1 Tbl vanilla sugar
3 Tbl cocoa powder
2 dl (100g) flour
a handful of blueberries (again: If you don't have any - just leave 'em out!)

Alright, heat the oven to a balmy 175°C. Then put the butter and the chocolate into a pot and melt them over low heat. When they are liquid, you turn the heat off and let it cool a bit.

Stir up the sugar, vanilla sugar and the eggs until they are a bit fluffy. Mix the flour and the cocoa powder and stir it slowly into the egg-sugar-mass. Then stir in the butter. You are now done and it took about 10 minutes.

Pour the batter into a cake form and push the whole thing into the oven. The cake is perfectly done in about 13-15 minutes. Stick a fork into the middle of the cake after 13 minutes. There should still be A LOT of thick dough sticking to it. Otherwise it's a boring old chocolate cake. But if you take it out now, it will be gooey and chewy and a bit like a brownie and we want that! All of that!

Okay, so you take the cake out and let it cool and then you preferably eat it with vanilla ice cream and strawberries. Or right out of the form while you watch a Sandra Bullock movie. Whatever works for you, honey...


1/05/2015

We'll cut them a smile each.

New year, new tv show obsession. My newest addiction when it comes to watching shows is a stylish little gem called "Peaky Blinders" and it's produced and broadcast (surprise, surprise!) by the BBC.


"Peaky Blinders" takes place in Birmingham in 1919 (at the start of the series). It follows a group of men called the Peaky Blinders who get their name from their hats which have razor blades sewn into the visors.


They are a kind of mafia organization, operating in the worst parts of Birmingham. On their very front, their leader: Thomas Shelby (played by Cillian Murphy), a heavily traumatized veteran of WW1 who has a broken heart and can't get to sleep without his opium pipe.

(Another word about Cillian Murphy: Going into this show I scoffed at my friend who told me that this was the prettiest man in the whole wide world. After watching the first season in three short days I can now wholeheartedly agree with her. This man and his cheekbones of ivory make this show! Smoldering gazes, long silences and large tumblers of whiskey that are chucked in one go, plus the clothes which look at least as good as Sherlock's black coat and wavy locks. And the cheekbones, oh god the cheekbones... If you like handsome men and have some sort of libido, you will be like me and have to drink an extralarge Gin & Tonic during the most aesthetic sex scene of all times. I mean, look at the man! Good god!)


At the very beginning of the show, Tommy gets his hands on a buttload of stolen weapons and this causes a new, mean police chief with direct orders from Winston Churchill to come to Birmingham.

Also new in town is a lovely Irish barmaid with a secret past. And of course she is pretty and Tommy thinks so too. Intrigued yet?!



The whole thing is impeccably stylish and dark and exciting and intriguing and basically just awesome as fuck. The soundtrack is largely Tom Waits, The White Stripes and Arctic Monkeys, which mixes surprisingly well with the 1920s setting.



So if you're like me and suffer from serious Sherlock withdrawal - the BBC has at least provided us with something brilliant to shorten the wait! As always: Go binge watch it now and thank me later...



1/04/2015

Should old acquaintance be forgot.


Already 4 days into this new year, here are the lousy 4 pictures I actually took on New Year's Eve. Which - I guess - is a good sign, since I was way too busy having fun and so completely forgot to take any more.


The night started out with my lovely friend Nic hanging out at my place and helping me through all of this food and two bottles of champagne. Topics of conversation were plans to get filthy rich and take over the world with being awesome. So, basically the usual...


When we were already full and warm and cozy, we pushed ourselves out the door and went to a club, which was very fun. Look at the fantastic girls I got to spend NYE with! <3


After a bit of dancing, we ended up in an Irish Pub with a final glass of whiskey, some Tayto crisps and cute Irish boys to look at. Not bad.


But the real kicker came the next morning. Starting 2015 on the right foot. I think a hashtag is in order: #yummy


Here's what I did last year on NYE.